Don’t Let Anger Control You!

Have you noticed that few people can get you angrier than your spouse? It doesn’t seem like it should be this way, but it is in many marriages. Experience has shown that the closer the relationship, the stronger the emotions. And this includes the emotion of anger. Ask yourself three questions:

• Question 1: Has anger done anything for your relationship lately? Answer: probably not. More likely, uncontrolled anger in its various forms has set your marriage back a few steps.
• Question 2: Even though emotions tend to run high between marriage partners, does anger have to be such a normal part of your relationship? Answer: definitely not. The Lord can help you solve conflict in much better ways.
• Question 3: If anger is an issue in your marriage, are you willing to take measures to change this? If the answer is “yes,” get started by looking at a tremendous piece of guidance from Ephesians. It’s simple to understand, but more challenging to integrate into your relationship with your spouse.

“Be angry, and do not sin: do not let the sun go down on your wrath” (Ephesians 4:26, NKJV).

Ephesians 4:26 tells us two things: don’t sin and don’t let your anger get drawn out over long periods.

First, anger is a normal human response.

The Lord knows this, but warns that in our anger we are not to sin. In other words, don’t let your anger cause you to do or say something harmful or disrespectful to your partner. Both husband and wife need to attack the issue, not the other person.

Second, don’t draw your anger out.

Settle the issue as quickly as you can. Giving your partner the silent treatment doesn’t work. Ignoring the issue doesn’t work either.

Even though you both may be angry, keep your emotions in check and try to settle your differences calmly. Get another person to help if necessary. Above all, ask the Lord to give you both the wisdom and understanding to work out your differences. He will help you.