Below are some additional interactions on the article: Anger Gives Me Control. Read it first.
Challenge:
Read over this passage, Romans 8:1–17. This is how we are set apart, by living a life in step with the Holy Spirit. Meditate on these words and pray that God would help you to live the way he has set out for you.
Words:
Take some time to check out this website. It goes through and gives you practical ways of recognizing someone who is trying to control you and gives you ideas on how to distance yourself from unhealthy relationships if you believe that is what you should do.
Sometimes it is good to give ourselves space from a relationship that can be toxic, but other times it can be our job to point out the downfalls of our brothers and sisters in Christ. However, when you do, remember 1 Corinthians 13:4–7 and always speak with love.
This site can also be a good site for you to help you to recognize the controlling tendencies you may exhibit in your own life.
Quizical:
Often times when we are feeling a desire to control others it is because we are actually angry at ourselves. This is why emotional intelligence is so important. We want to make sure that we are aware of ourselves and our feelings so that we don’t take our anger out on other people. This quiz will help you check your understanding of stress, what can cause it, warning signs, common problems related to stress and how to prevent stress. Check it out!
Audio:
Part 1
Part 2
Part 3
Part 4
Part 5
Scripture:
Matthew 6:19–21—By serving others and treating them the way that God desires, we can build relationships of trust and love, treasures that will last into eternity.
Philippians 2:3–4—Here Paul tells us to humble ourselves and serve others, the opposite of our natural tendencies sometimes.
2 Corinthians 5:16–18—The Bible tells us that when we turn to the Lord, he is faithful and begins to re-shape us into the young men and women he desires for us to be.
Psalm 4:4—When you are angry, be still and search your heart to understand why.
Psalm 1:1–3—A blessing for those who follow God and his word.
Small Group Guide:
Video:
Hillsong sings “From the Inside Out”
Large Group Guide:
Life Questions:
- I love Psalm 4:4. I think it’s an important verse to remember when we are feeling angry or feeling a need to try to control things. Psalm 4:4 encourages us to search our hearts. Take this verse and put it in a place where you will see it each day; somewhere you can’t get away from it. Keep it there until you have memorized it.
- Think about the different people in your life that you have tried to control. Take some time to reflect on your life; write it out if that helps. Sometimes it can be hard to see the things that we have done, but Christ offers to come to us where we are and help us to grow more like him. Ask God to forgive you for the people you have manipulated and taken advantage of.
- Think about those who have taken advantage of you. Grieve the loss. Maybe it was small, maybe it was big, but know that it is okay to grieve. It’s more than okay; it’s good and healing. Ask God to begin to heal your heart.
- Start a new pattern today. After confessing and grieving, give thanks to God for the good friends or influences in your life. Send them a handwritten thank you note. This will help you as God begins to change you from the inside out.
Reflect:
Look up and remember Ephesians 4:31 and get help working through the anger going on inside of you because Christ died for us and desires for us to live in a better way.
